93: "Hitler Robot Santa...What Did I Miss?!?" - The Santa Clause 2 & 3

It's never too late to say "Merry Christmas" and it's never too late for two Disney Christmas movies that should never have been released in theaters.  It's a super-sized episode where we discuss The Santa Clause 2 starring SNL alum Molly Shannon and The Santa Clause 3 starring Martin Short.  Watch Santa get laid.  See Elizabeth Mitchell as a sexy Professor Snape.  Watch Judge Reinhold get more and more creepy.  Hear more farts than you thought you wanted.  Watch an hour of Alan Arkin and then introduce time travel into your movie.  Merry Christmas, we put two big lumps of shit in your stocking.
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92: "You Had Me At Clown. You Lost Me At Rape." - The Santa Clause (1994)

Stuff your stocking with a little holiday murder.  It's The Santa Clause starring Tim Allen and SNL alum Mary Gross.  Why does Santa always pick Christmas Eve to take a vacation or commit suicide?  Why does Santa have to be fat?  Why can't we put that Naughty and Nice List on a floppy disk?  Why do the elves show no remorse over Santa's death?  Why are there so many Christmas movies that focus on the fact that Santa doesn't exist?  All these questions plus a laundry list of shitty Whoopi Goldberg movies and some information on the Disney film Santa Paws.  Enjoy!
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91: "Chekhov's Gnome With Big Tits" - A Gnome Named Gnorm aka Upworld (1990)

Remember E.T. and how cute and cuddly he was?  What was he missing?  That's right a raging libido and the urge to bone hot ladies all the time.  That's basically the plot of A Gnome Named Gnorm released in some parts of the country under the alternate title Upworld.  Anthony Michael Hall is back playing dress-up as the worst cop in California and he's partnered with a terrifying puppet.  It's like Lethal Weapon if, instead of Danny Glover, Riggs was played by a goblin from Labyrinth.  This movie is on YouTube in it's entirety and we highly recommend checking it out just for the sole fact that you get to see Jerry Orbach bitch slap a puppet gnome.  Enjoy!
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90: "It Was Just Racist Enough" - Soul Man (1986)

C. Thomas Howell and Arye Gross, two people who should not be headlining a comedy play two guys who hate studying that somehow get into Harvard Law School in the hit 1986 comedy "Soul Man".  This tells the story of class struggles really as a rich white kid gets mercilessly cut off from his parents and digs deep into his soul to truly find himself.  Oh yeah, this is the blackface comedy that set our country back many a year.  Howell exceeds the recommended dosage on some tanning pills to turn himself black to get a scholarship.  If you think that last sentence makes sense then you can get into this comedy that for some weird reason kinda works.  You have to get past the fact that this Brat Packer is in blackface the entire film but if you forget that there are some good gags.  Enough that both of us give it a recommendation.  This movie is so 1980s it features a performance by Ronald Reagan Jr. and whatever happened to Brian Benben?  Oh by the way, Julia Louis-Dreyfus is in this movie too.  Enjoy!
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89: "The KGB Are Really Sloppy At Staging Suicides" - Best Defense (1984)

We finally got to Eddie Murphy and we're discussing a god damn mess of a movie.  From 1984, it's 'Best Defense' starring Dudley Moore and 'strategic guest star' Eddie Murphy.  If you don't know the story of this movie, it was completely filmed with Dudley Moore and then screenings went so poorly that they filmed a subplot starring Eddie Murphy.  They share no screen time in the film and their story lines take place 2 years apart.  Dudley Moore plays an engineer, who seems to know nothing about engineering, that works at a company making tank parts for the military.  Eddie Murphy stars, in a parallel universe, as a soldier in the finished tank who accidentally finds himself in the middle of the Iraq invasion of Kuwait.  Eerily, Iraq invaded Kuwait six years after this movie came out.  What a bizarrely absurd movie.  And just for clarification, I found out after we recorded that this was directed by the same man who directed 'Howard The Duck' and I'm ashamed that I didn't know that trivia earlier.
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88: "Maybe Hitler Wasn't That Bad" - Labor Pains (2009)

It's Janeane Garofalo week on Saturday Night Jive and Chris Parnell is along for the ride as we watch "Labor Pains", the Lindsay Lohan movie that skipped it's theatrical release and premiered on ABC Family.  This is the story of a horrible person who does a horrible thing and is then arbitrarily forgiven for it.  Can you not fire pregnant women even if they suck at their jobs?  How do publishing companies work?  How do you market books?  Neither us or the movie seem to know the answers to these questions.  Also this is our first podcast in Donald Trump's America so we get a little political, don't worry we get back to the movie shortly afterwards.
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87: "Bipartisan Coroner" - You Don't Mess With The Zohan (2008)

We picked Robert Smigel out of the hat and that means we are doing yet another Adam Sandler movie, "You Don't Mess With The Zohan".  It's been a while since we've been divided on a film.  George thinks that this movie is not worth watching for the few good jokes while Ben thinks the end justifies the means.  Rob Schneider crosses Palestinian off the racist Bingo card that is his life and for some reason this movie also features Dave Matthews, John McEnroe and the 'Let's Get Ready To Runble' guy.  We also get a little political as we are visited by Hillary supporters mid-podcast.  Enjoy!
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86: "Iron Lung Poon" - The Ex (2007)

We pulled Fred Armisen's name out of the hat and that means we are watching 'The Ex' a hidden gem from 2007 starring Zach Braff, Jason Bateman, Amanda Peet, Charles Grodin, Mia Farrow, Amy Poehler, Amy Adams, Paul Rudd, Donal Logue... Sheesh, who isn't in this movie?  Oh yeah, anyone doing anything funny.  An all star cast elicits no laughs in this story about a new dad moving his way up the corporate ladder who has to deal with a new nemesis, a guy in a wheelchair with a big old dick.  Ben declares this as possibly the worst movie we've seen yet, so much so that he falls asleep during the podcast.  Luckily, we are joined by special guest Nate to drown out his Zzzzzs.  Enjoy!
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85: "Mother Flipping Viking High Divers" - Airheads (1994)

We're here to talk about a movie featuring 3 SNL alums, Chris Farley, Adam Sandler and Michael McKean all star in 'Airheads' from 1994.  This is one of the better movies we've covered on Saturday Night Jive.  We assumed a movie we liked as kids would not hold up but we both really liked the characters and thought it was a fun and funny 90s film.  Airheads is the story of 3 rockers who take a radio station hostage in order to get their demo played.  It also stars Brendan Fraser, Steve Buscemi, Joe Mantegna, Ernie Hudson, Michael Richards and David Arquette, all giving good performances.  Enjoy!
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84: "Please Don't Send Me To The Cornfield, Ed" - Good Burger (1997)

We're back to discuss yet another Kenan Thompson film.  It's Good Burger, the Kenan and Kel film from Nickelodeon Studios.  In this cinema classic we follow a mentally challenged young man who gets screwed over and taken advantage of by his best friend.  Ed, our favorite fast food employee, is obviously a stoner character but since this is a children's film we just say he's comically stupid.  Unfortunately, since he is also a child, it is hard to join in on the fun when all we want to do is make sure he gets home okay.  How does Good Burger stay in business when mental defectives run the cash register?  Can you make a children's film with murder and cannibalism in it?  Why do they send an adult woman to seduce a child?  Is there a greater conspiracy involving Ed's wealthy and eccentric family?  Who books the guests for Linda Richman's talk show?  All these questions will be answered as well as a lot of Abe Vigoda love in this very un-PC episode of Saturday Night Jive.  Enjoy!
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83: "Troll A Good Novie" - Troll (1986)

It's Brad Hall week on Saturday Night Jive and we are talking about the 1986 classic, also featuring his wife and fellow SNL alum Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Troll.  I think we were all a little surprised by how this movie is pretty good.  Join us as we watch Harry Potter, Jr. discover that his little sister has been possessed by a troll and is trying to turn his entire apartment into a fantasy world.  Enjoy!
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82: "A 50 Dollar Bill In A Pile Of Turds" - Little Nicky (2000)

This week on Saturday Night Jive we are talking Adam Sandler's first outright bomb, the 2000 comedy Little Nicky.  Here he plays the son of the devil who has to save hell from his evil brothers.  It is filled with homophobia, goofy voices and plenty of product placement for Popeye's Chicken.  We dance around talking about this movie because it really is a bummer to watch and talk about.  We diverge into discussions about Hitler jokes, The Arquette family and insertion shots in porn.  Stay tuned next week for a hopefully livelier discussion of a Brad Hall film and check out George's blog http://gabbyawards.blogspot.com/ to read some reviews of SNL from season 20 and his youtube page, "Georgebaileyactor" to see some short films we have made.
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81: "Dan's Aykroyd's Big Fat Ass" - Rainbow (1996)

Did you know Bob Hoskins directed a children's film about kids riding rainbows?  Neither did we but Dan Aykroyd is in it as a fat southern sheriff so we can talk about it.  This is 'Rainbow' from 1996 and for being the first film shot in Hi-Def, it looks like shit.

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80: "Bitch Slap From An Old Jew" - Motorama (1991)

It's Robin Duke week on Saturday Night Jive!  We delved deep into the hidden corners of IMDB to discover a movie featuring not one, but two SNL alums, "Motorama".  Neither of us had any knowledge of this movie before we saw it and we may not have any knowledge of it after either.  This is a movie about a 10 year old kid (or is he an old man?) in a stolen Mustang on a road trip trying to collect all the pieces to a game called Motorama so he can win the grand prize.  On the way he meets Garrett Morris, Michael J. Pollard, Flea, Robin Duke, Meatloaf, Shelly Berman, Drew Barrymore, Robert Picardo (who may or may not be God), Dick Miller and Jack Nance.  He also gets raped, tattooed, beaten up, thrown out a window, and meets his future self.  This movie makes no damn sense.  It's like David Lynch decided to make a film for children.  Take this cross country journey with us on this week's episode of Saturday Night Jive.  We also geek out a little bit about Twin Peaks coming back.  Enjoy!
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79: "Magical Tears" - Underdogs aka Metegol (2016)

This week on Saturday Night Jive we are talking about the U.S. dub of Underdogs, an Argentinian animated film featuring the voices of 3 SNL alums.  Bobby Moynhian, Taran Killam and Jay Pharoah all make appearances in this movie, available on Netflix streaming.  A young man is in a pickle when his town is bought by his childhood bully and the restaurant he works at is destroyed.  His solution, challenge him to a soccer match with the help of his tiny Foosball team which has become sentient because of his magic tears.  The movie is actually pretty good, especially once we get to a montage where our hero gathers a ragtag group of townies to make up his team (including a hermit, an emo kid, a criminal and a catholic priest).  Bobby Moynihan plays 4 characters in the movie and we also discuss the fact that he may be in the top tier of all-time SNL cast members.  The movie also features the voices of Nicholas Hoult, Mel Brooks, Ariana Grande and Chazz Palminteri.  Enjoy!
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78: "I Need All The Disinfectant" - Disclosure (1994)

Dennis Miller was our SNL alum this week and we are discussing the 1994 Michael Douglas/Demi Moore sexual harassment/virtual reality film "Disclosure".  This film has everything, hard R sex scenes, ridiculous 90s technology, boner discussions, and, oh yeah, virtual reality.  Why put virtual reality in a movie about a female boss seducing her male employee?  Did Michael Douglas sleep with a bobcat?  Why is there a sub genre of films where women go crazy after getting a little Michael Douglas dick? and what is the deal with Michael Douglas's best friend's weird sex habits?  Disclosure was based on a novel by Michael Crichton and directed by Barry Levinson, who after "Toys" and "Man Of The Year" makes his third appearance on the podcast.  We are joined this week by Dirty Sons Of Pitches costar Nate and we also get into a nice discussion of SNL memories and the amazing stand-up of David Koechner.  Enjoy!
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77: "She Has Built Herself A Murder Car" - Taxi (2004)

Remember when a young Jimmy Fallon left SNL to conquer Hollywood, only to sink into obscurity for 5 years before he became the second heir to the Jay Leno throne?  This week on Saturday Night Jive we are discussing the 2004 Jimmy Fallon, Queen Latifah vehicle (get it?) 'Taxi'.  This is a remake of a French film produced by Luc Besson, which neither of us have seen but the fact that it has 3 sequels and doesn't involve an unfunny Jimmy Fallon, we can only assume is far better.  The American version was written by Reno 911 creators Tom Lennon and Robert Ben Garant and has lots of sexy shots of Giselle Bundchen, unfunny Jimmy Fallon bits, car stunts, and a big drunk Ann-Margret.  How does a mentally challenged man get hired and keep his job on the NYC police force?  What bizarre hours does the NYC BMV keep?  Why did they design so many buildings to house epic car chases?  How does Queen Latifah keep her incredibly attractive boyfriend?  We also discuss the current SNL cast shake-ups (Goodbye Taran Killam, Jay Pharoah and Jon Rudnitsky) and are sponsored this week by Gary's Getaway Garage.  When you have to modify your car to commit crimes there is no better place in New York City to go.  Enjoy!

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76: "Suprise Poo" - True Identity (1991)

In 1991 Sir Lenny Harris graced the United States with his presence and gave us "True Identity".  The movie tells the story of Miles Pope, a wanna-be Shakespearean actor who runs a fowl of the mafia and has to pose as a white man to hide.  He then poses as the assassin sent to kill him.  It's a comedy where Frank Langella gives the funniest performance if that is any indication to the quality.  Saturday Night Jive is here to dissect this film which features an extended cameo by SNL alum Michael McKean along with James Earl Jones as himself and the Pierre Bernard of comedy, Charles Lane.  This movie was also written by Andy Breckman who wrote the classic SNL sketch "White Like Me".  How easy is it to sneak into FBI headquarters?  Why do so many 90s comedies involve the mafia?  How dangerous are waterbeds?  And is sitting down to pee more comfortable for a man?  These questions and more in this week's episode.
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75: "Shit Flakes" - Foodfight! (2013)

Not since 'Freddy Got Fingered' have we been so adamant that this is the worst film we have watched.  'Foodfight!' tells the story of Dex Dogtective as he runs around a supermarket that comes to life after it closes searching for his lost love, a sexy and possibly blind cat-human hybrid thing.  Along the way he uncovers a secret plot that may eliminate all the mascots from existence, so with the help of Mr. Clean, Mrs. Butterworth, Charlie Tuna and The Vlasic Pickle Stork he wages a war with the only weapon at their disposal, food.  Think 'Toy Story' but with food mascots, sexual innuendos, terrible puns, vomit inducing animation and Nazis, lots of Nazis.  Chris Kattan voices an annoying penguin which brings this movie to the podcast.  The movie features a cast that includes Charlie Sheen, Ed Asner, Christopher Lloyd, Hilary Duff, Wayne Brady, Eva Longoria, Larry Miller, Jerry Stiller, Harvey Fierstein and Christine Baranski but with zero laughs and did we mention this movie looks like a big pile of garbage?  Get ready for the most confounding movie discussion in Saturday Night Jive history.  It's FOODFIGHT!, enjoy.
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74: "She's A Vampire And A Ghost" - Twixt (2011)

In 2011 Francis Ford Coppola made an almost unwatchable horror film called "Twixt".  Luckily, he gave Father Guido Sarducci aka Don Novello a small part so we can discuss it on Saturday Night Jive.  This movie put Ben to sleep and made George scream obscenities at the TV.  What happened to Francis Ford Coppola and does he know how shitty this is?  Is this an elaborate con?  Why do all alternate dimensions have to do with Hitler?  Is 30,000 books sold OK business?  Was this movie secretly directed by a goat?  These questions and more in this week's Saturday Night Jive.  Enjoy!

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73: "Bustin' Makes Me Feel Good" Ghostbusters (2016)

Meninists get ready, we're talking 2016's Ghostbusters!  Alas, you misguided white men, your protests are in vain.  This movie stinks with or without a controversy.  Join us for a spirited discussion on one of the worst reboots in a summer full of them.  This movie has a lot of gags but no connective tissue.  It's almost as if they cut the plot from the movie to make room for more ad-libbed jokes, which is evidenced by it's Master Of Disguise like end credits.  Ghostbusters stars Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones and (don't worry) a ton of superfluous cameos from the original movie.
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72: "Squeeze The Pig Piss Over Baby Mila Kunis" - Krippendorf's Tribe (1998)

Remember when Richard Dreyfuss did a movie almost entirely in blackface?  No?  Well, you've never seen Krippendorf's Tribe!  What starts off as a mediocre 90s family comedy turns into a hidden gem that may or may not know just how racist it is.  This family comedy has circumcision, a girl's first period, pig piss, dildos, a lot of blackface and a dirty dirty sex scene (also in blackface).  This week's SNL alum was Siobhan Fallon, who you may not rememeber from SNL, but she will always have a special place in our hearts for introducing us to this bizarre movie.  How does a college afford to have such a big anthropology staff?  How much of a piece of human garbage is James Krippendorf?  Why can't Paul Giamatti play Big Momma?  How could you lie to Larry Swift?  and, oh my god, that sex scene...
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71: "Thank God For White People" - High School High (1996)

In 1996 Jon Lovitz starred in the pop culture parody High School High.  20 years later, we are here to discuss it.  Unfortunately, this movie leaves little to talk about.  It's a spoof movie with about a 50% joke to laugh ratio.  We do get to an actual conversation about SNL though, so that's a plus.  How racist is this movie?  Does it realize it's racism?  Who is the worst actor to have an Oscar?  Is Rhinestone Cowboy a listenable song?  These questions and more on this week's episode of Saturday Night Jive.
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70: "Little Chick Dick" - Wired (1989)

It is time for the failed 1989 biopic of original Not Ready For Prime Time Player John Belushi.  It's Wired, the movie based on the Bob Woodward book with too much truth in it.  This movie is far more interesting to talk about than watch.  This movie didn't get the rights to use Saturday Night Live sketches so they instead bizarrely recreated them with Richard Nixon Coneheads.  It also decides to put Bob Woodward in the movie as a character who sits on Belushi's death bed.  How did Belushi die?  What does Michael Chiklis look like naked?  How old is Alex Rocco? Did Dan Aykroyd ever call back his witch army?  The answers to all those questions and more in this weel's episode.  Enjoy!
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69: "Adam Sandler Cured My Cancer" - The Do-Over (2016)

We're here for the 69th episode (tee hee hee) of Saturday Night Jive.  If you think that's funny, you should watch "The Do-Over" the Netflix original film starring Adam Sandler and David Spade.  We are both evenly divided and united at the same time on this movie.  While it is not a "good" film it does have enough laughs to sustain the ludicrous plot points.  We are talking chick fights, pegging, Swardson, three ways, floppy fake titties and The Commish/Daddio himself Michael Chiklis.  Why does Adam Sandler dig into a dead corpse's ass?  We may never know but we can theorize in this week's episode.  Enjoy!  Also, they cure cancer in this movie.

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68: "Is That Dave Matthews?" - I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry

Every now and then an issue comes along that only two straight guys can solve.  Adam Sandler and Kevin James play two boobs who decide a domestic partnership is the solution to all of their problems in "I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry".  We will pitch alternate versions of this story where one or both of them are actually gay, discuss why everyone in New York wants a little bit of Sandler's dick and why New York City is the most homophobic city in America.  We also get into the gratuitous Sandler cameos from Dave Matthews, David Spade, Dan Aykroyd, Steve Buscemi, Ving Rhames, Richard Chamberlain, Robert Smigel, Tila Tequila and the Mr. Yunioshi of our times Rob Schneider.  Did we mention that this movie was written by Alexander Payne?
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67: "My Blue Eyed Angel" - Clifford (1994)/Normal, Ohio

Saturday Night Jive is back after an extended hiatus.  This week we are discussing the much maligned 1994 Martin Short vehicle "Clifford".  The movie leaves us with a few questions, mainly which came first a movie about a horrible 10 year old kid or a movie featuring a 40 year old man in short pants.  We also discuss our lack of viewing current SNL episodes, the justly cancelled John Goodman sitcom "Normal, Ohio" and a run in with George from the future.  Enjoy!
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66: "Smarter Than The Average Hiccup" - Yogi Bear

This week on Saturday Night Jive we are discussing Academy Award nominated Dan Aykroyd's (lest we forget) voice work in Yogi Bear and God bless Andy Daly for saving it.  Why is Yogi Bear a secondary character in his own movie?  Why cast Justin Timberlake as an unrecognizable voice?  Why do we keep putting love stories in movies for children?  How do we save Jellystone National Park?  Why not the fact that it has a god damn talking bear?  Why do people still love fireworks?  We address all of this and more this week, including the Kentucky Fried Conspiracy.  Apologies for the audio quality (we are still figuring out the best way to record since moving) and also for Ben's hiccups.  Enjoy!
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65: "Virgin Whore" - Crossroads (2002)

Oh folks!  It is that time again.  This week we are talking the acting debut of Britney Spears.  It's the 2002 film Crossroads featuring Dan Aykroyd and, occasionally, his southern accent.  This movie has it all: infidelity, driving, murder, miscarriages, mysterious blue bottles, karaoke competitions, Kool Moe Dee and time capsules.  Listen as Ben comes to terms with his feelings towards the sexualization of teenage girls, while George is just fine with it.  Get in your underwear, put on your pajamas and enjoy, in that order.
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64: "Can A Bitch Get A Donut?" - Highway To Hell, Larry David, Melissa McCarthy

This week on Saturday Night Jive we discuss two episodes of SNL hosted by Larry David and Melissa McCarthy and then dissect a hidden gem from 1991 called "Highway To Hell" featuring two SNL alums; Ben Stiller and Gilbert Gottfried as Attila The Hun and Adolph Hitler, respectively.  Is this movie a comedy, a thriller, a horror, a love story between Satan and a young boy?  Nobody really knows.  Stay tuned after the show for "Maybe The Next Time", the baffling musical choice that ends the movie.
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63: "Jeffrey Jones's Balls" - Houseguest

How did Sinbad get in that mailbox?  If you've seen the poster for the 1995 movie "Houseguest", that question has been on your mind for the past 21 years.  This week on Saturday Night Jive we will delve deep into that question and more as we discuss, sadly, one of Phil Hartman's few starring vehicles.  We also question the business model of the mafia, discuss the price of 1994 baseball cards, get to the bottom of Jeffrey Jones's sex offender convictions, get into some mediocre 90s stand-up comedians, pitch a remake of "The Parent Trap" and plan some insurance fraud.  Enjoy and stay tuned for some bizarre Christmas carol parodies performed by the stars of the film.
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62: "Dog Satan" - Spooky Buddies

This week we are digging in (get it? like a dog) to another film in the Air Buddies franchise.  We're getting our fright on and talking Spooky Buddies.  This may be the final time we discuss a Buddies film as Ben wants to kill himself.  George feels that we go out on top with one of the better installments (that is until we get to Santa Buddies in December).  Does Harland Williams give a credible performance?  How long can you play Monster Mash?  How horrible are these dog owners?  Who gave a dog a license to run a business?  Is the director of these films making movies specifically for George?  These questions and more on this week's Saturday Night Jive.  Also, we know it's a cheat to watch this movie for the podcast as it features no SNL castmember, but the buddies are all offspring of a dog played by Molly Shannon so it is canon.  See you next time with more shit.
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61: "Fat Dog Goes To The Fat Kid" - Air Buddies

Saturday Night Jive is back!  Happy 2016!  To ring in the new year we are delving into "Air Buddies" featuring the voice of SNL alum Molly Shannon as Air Bud's bitch.  Remember Air Bud, the basketball playing pooch?  Did you know he also went on to play baseball, soccer and football?  Did you know he went on to father five adorable puppies, all with their own unique personality that coincides with their name?  This week and the next 8 will be focused on the buddies franchise, that's right there are 8 of them.  Air Buddies is about their first adventure where they have to rescue their parents from evil dog-nappers.  They also encounter a wolf voiced by Michael Clarke Duncan, a goat voiced by Wallace Shawn, a pig that speaks in pig latin, a biker gang that loves puppies and puppy related movies and one of the puppies gets drunk on wine.  All films are available on Netflix streaming, George finds them absurd and delightful while Ben thinks these are the last 8 weeks of his life.  Enjoy them with us!
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