Saturday, April 22, 2023

327: "Kate Beckinsale's Lucky Hat" - Tiptoes (2003)

This week on Saturday Night Jive we watched Tiptoes starring Gary Oldman as a dwarf.  It's a nonsensical film about Matthew McConaughey who is the only non-dwarf in a family of dwarves and he's about to get married to Kate Beckinsale (who sometimes wears a hat).  She doesn't know anything about his family and freaks out when she realizes her soon-to-be-born child might be a dwarf.  So she confronts him at fire fighting training camp, he brings two whores to a dwarf party, David Alan Grier fucks a dwarf, Peter Dinklage and Patricia Arquette fuck to some reggae music, a dad tells a limerick about farts, Jewish wedding.  It's a tale as old as time.  Oh yeah, and Gary Oldman plays McConaughey's dwarf brother so he's on his knees the whole film while he's surrounded by actual little person actors.  It's a big old plate of wrong with a salad of what the fuck on the side.  There are no SNL alums in this movie but David Alan Grier hosted SNL twice and by all accounts should have been a cast member.  Enjoy!

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